Its about making memories worth repressing
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize