we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
