Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
