I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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