I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize