Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
