Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
