i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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