we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize