apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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