Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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