Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
