WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Randomize
