i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
