My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
