The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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