cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
