I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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