i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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