i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
