is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
i think we sleep fucked last night...
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
