he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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