sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Randomize
