All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
