I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
