hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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