Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
