there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
NoShamevember. You game?
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize