I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
handjob tips. give me some.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
