i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
