do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
