I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Randomize