What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
