I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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