Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize
