can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Randomize
