That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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