well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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