i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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