well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
