32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
