tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
