I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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