i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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