yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
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