The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I can't put those talents on a resume
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
