Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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