oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize