Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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