I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
