You can't motorboat a personality
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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