i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
FUCK WHALES
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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